On the Brink of Disaster

Frustrated. Sick. Disappointed. Surprised. Angry. Baffled. Confused. Pissed.

Pick one. All those words do a pretty good job of explaining how I feel about the Cavs-Magic series right now. As I wrote in my last post, I knew Orlando would provide a very stiff test for the Cavs. They just don't match-up well with with the Magic, and it's showed over the past few years as Orlando has pretty much owned the Wine & Gold during the regular season. But, that said, I still thought the Cavs would win this series and advance on to the NBA Finals. Now? Well, obviously, I'm not so sure.

I'm keeping this short and sweet because I could easily write 10,000 words about what's gone wrong in this series (and I very well might do that when it's all said and done). For now, let's focus on a couple of glaring things:

Mo Williams

I thought Mo was fantastic during the regular season. I was pissed when he didn't make the All-Star team originally, and I was glad when he eventually was picked. I thought it was well-deserved. But that was the regular season. Mo has not been himself in the playoffs, and especially in this series. This is his first career trip through the playoffs -- and it's been a bumpy ride. I give him credit; he isn't backing down. He still goes out there every night and takes his shots. He's still playing hard. But the results definitely haven't been there. He's scoring, but it's taking him way too many shots to get his points. Here's his field goal numbers in the first four games: 6-for-19, 7-21, 5-16 and 5-15. Yikes. And it gets worse. Here's what he's done from 3-point range: 2-for-8, 1-6, 3-10 and 0-3. This is a guy who shot 47% from the field and 44% on 3's during the regular season. He looked better in Game 4 until he completely disappeared in the 4th quarter. He has to play better. Obviously.

Cavs Defense vs. the 3-Pointer

Or better yet, lack thereof. Sports are pretty simple. Take away the other team's strength and exploit their weakness. The Cavs have done neither. In case you haven't noticed, Orlando shoots the 3-ball pretty well. Well, someone might want to inform the Cavs coaching staff. The old basketball addage says that a jump-shooting team will live and die by the 3. The Magic are living quite well, thank you. You would think the Cavs would make an adjustment at some point and try to take that away. What they are doing is (clearly) not working. Orlando is getting wide open 3 after wide open 3 in this series. Hence, these numbers from 3-point range in the first four games: 9-for-20, 10-23, 6-17 and 17-38. That's 42 3-pointers made in four games. And they're shooting them at a 43% clip. That's staggering considering the amount of 3's they take. But here's the thing -- they're WIDE OPEN! They're good shooters as it is, and they're WIDE OPEN! That's what happens when you waste so much time doubling Dwight Howard. It's driving me crazy.

Dwight Howard can only score on dunks, put-backs and at the free throw line. If he gets a dunk every now and again, so be it. Last I checked 2 points is less than 3. And even though he's turned into Mark Price at the foul line the past 2 games, I'm still okay with using fouls on him and making him earn it at the stripe. Howard dominated the first half of Game 1 and he dominated the first half of Game 4. The Cavs had no answer for him inside. He scored at will. Well, guess what? The Cavs led 63-48 at the half in Game 1 and 58-50 at the break in Game 4. That's because while Howard was going off nobody else was getting many shots. That should be the Cavs' goal. Dwight Howard can't win a game by himself offensively. He's not skilled enough if you make him catch the ball 10-12 feet from the basket. But, the Magic can win games with their 3-point shooting (as they did in Game 4).

My suggestion? Quit doubling-down on Howard so much, and STOP leaving 3-point shooters to help on a guy driving to the basket. The Cavs get caught scrambling and it always leads to an open 3. Let's see if Orlando can score by beating people off the dribble and actually finishing at the rim instead of kicking out for a wide open 3. No one on their team has proven they can do that consistently other than possibly Turkoglu. You just can't give up 17 3's in a game and expect to win. Stay with the shooters!!

The Swagger is Gone

The Cavs just haven't looked like the same team in this series. Their confidence isn't what it was leading up to this serries. They -- I hate to say it -- look like they're afraid they're going to lose. Orlando is definitely in their head. The Cavs are tensing up in big moments and reverting back to "stand-around-and-watch-LeBron-mode." That's not good. They got out of that bad habit during the regular season and the first two rounds of the playoffs, but it's returned lately. All I know is they better find that swagger real quick or I'll be writing a 10,000-word "How did this happen?" post within the next couple of days. And no one wants that.


With all that said, and with as bad as things have looked so far -- it's not over. I'm trying to stay optimistic. We still have LeBron. Every game (other than Game 3) has been very tight and has come down to the last possession. Just as the Magic could easily have already won this series 4-0, the Cavs could just as easily be up 3-1. If the Wine & Gold take Game 5 at home Thursday (and I think they will), it all comes down to Game 6 back in Orlando. Win that, and it's back home for a Game 7 with all the momentum in the world. That's the only way to look at it now. The odds are clearly stacked against them. Teams down 3-1 in a best-of-7 series are 8-182 in NBA playoff history.

But there were those 8.

Here's hoping the Cavs are number 9.

Hurt So Good

Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa, Rafael Palmeiro, Roger Clemens, Jason Giambi, Andy Pettitte, Alex Rodriguez, Manny Ramirez. These are some of the more high profile names that have been attached to performance enhancing drugs over the past 5 years. Included among the names listed is one of the greatest right handed pitchers of all time and what will most likely be 6 of the top 15 home run hitters of all time. While the uproar from the media, fans, hall of fame voters, and in some instances fellow players to clean up the game has been deafening at times, is it not just a little bit hypocritical? Believe me I am 100-percent in favor of steroid testing, and firmly believe all sports should adopt Olympic testing guidelines, but after looking at that list of players I just mentioned one would be naive to think that steroids did not help save the game.

August 12th, 1994. I was 11 years old, still young enough to view professional athletes as idols, not really understanding the business side of sports. When I heard the players were going on strike that day I had no clue what that meant, all I knew was that they weren't going to be playing baseball THAT day. I didn't know that one day would turn into 232 days. I didn't know that one day would turn into the first autumn since 1904 without a World Series. I didn't know that one day would turn into the first professional sports league to cancel its entire postseason due to a labor dispute. I didn't know anything other than the fact that as August turned to September, and September to October, and 1994 to 1995, and after no spring training, and a cancelled Opening Day, they still weren't playing baseball. When they finally did come back I still didn't understand completely but I knew I was angry, however I wasn't going to hold a grudge. The same could not be said for baseball fans all across the country.

Once the players returned to the park, it was the fans' turn to go on strike. Attendance at stadiums all across the country plummeted, a clear sign everyday Americans were not happy with whining millionaires. The 1995 season came and went with the only real story line being that the Braves finally won a World Series, their only title during a decade and a half of dominance in the N.L. East. 1996 rolled around and once again it was a non-descript season filled with empty ballparks. It wasn't until August of that season that fans began to pay attention but that was because of one player in one city...Cal Ripken's chase of Lou Gehrig's consecutive games mark. While that was a great moment for Ripken and for baseball it did little to incite interest in the game once the record was broken. 1997 came and went, albeit with a very good World Series, but lets face it, its hard to get interested when the Florida Marlins are in the World Series. That brings us to 1998...

It almost seemed as if it was predestined that Mark McGwire would make a serious chase for Roger Maris' home run mark having hit 52, and 58 home runs the two years prior, but no one could have predicted how much fun it was going to be once Sammy Sosa got involved. These two mountains of men captivated baseball fans all over the country, tracking down one of the most hallowed records in the game. Personally it was the most fun I have ever had watching teams I had no rooting interest in. I couldn't wait to turn on WGN at 2:05 almost everyday during the summer for that afternoon's Cubs game, and it seemed as if every Cardinals game somehow made its way onto ESPN. It was amazing and it lasted for a full season. Baseball was back and it was all because of the long ball.

The 1998 season set the tone for an offensive era the likes of which had never been seen before, with some remnants of that still hanging around (A-Rod in 2007, Manny at the end of last season.) People were coming back to the ballpark to see these behemoths hit balls to areas once thought to be unreachable. Fans loved it, I mean the home run is one of the most exciting if not awe-inspiring plays in baseball, and I am going to say it again....IT SAVED BASEBALL!!

Do I think the powers that be in Major League Baseball knew about the steroid problem way before they are letting on? Of course I do. Do I also know that MLB is a business and they will do anything to make money? Absolutely. This may be a conspiracy theory, but I believe Selig let it go on until it got to a point that it literally was out of control. At the same time, if that is true it worked. As a result of the home run, baseball is more prosperous than it has ever been. Fans are showing up in record numbers, almost every single baseball game is on TV, and many teams have made going to the ballpark an experience rather than just a game.

I am not condoning anything illegal here I am simply stating a fact with my own "eye-test". If steroids and the blown up statistics as result of them didn't save baseball then why are fans still showing up in these record numbers? Fans refused to show up to games after the strike. We are not seeing that same outcry as a result of the performance enhancing drug era. So the next time we (myself included) want to vilify these individuals for cheating the game, maybe we should thank them.

Cavs, UK and Puke

The layoff is over. I (like the Cavs) am back! I've got so many things I want to write about after the long layoff, but I won't hit all of them in this particular post. Without further ado...

I started a new job this week, so that's monopolized most of my time. Add that to an epic trip to Columbus last week to celebrate my new job and the result is my disappearance from the blog lately.

Speaking of that trip to Columbus ... the old body doesn't respond to a heroic night of drinking like it used to. I arrived in C-bus at 4:30 last Tuesday afternoon and within 45 minutes was sitting on the patio of Brazenhead in Old Dublin on a gorgeous evening with an Amstel Light in hand. Eleven hours later I was puking in Chad and Sean's kitchen sink wondering how the hell I got home and whether or not I would still be alive the next day. I was, but barely. I couldn't eat anything and I felt like I had to puke the entire day -- which made sense because I did have to puke the entire day. I was laying on Chad's bathroom floor at one point, after another round of upchuck, trying not to think about the fact that I was 28 years old and that all this was occuring on a Wednesday afternoon. Good times. Thanks, Andy Greene!!

Puking sucks. There's no two ways about it. But, I'll say this: I've had some very proud moments during puke sessions. For example, Chad and Sean went back to their place before I did that night and they still have no idea I puked in their sink (until they read this post anyway). How it's possible for our body and mind to get on the same page for brief moments during a bodily crisis like puking after an epic night of drinking is beyond me, but it happens. I was so fucked up I could barely stand to hold myself over the sink, but yet I still managed to muster the strength to clean up after myself. I had to. I was at my buddies' place after all. You clean up after yourself. No questions asked. And, if you're really good, you leave no evidence behind. I was ripping off paper towels, clearing out the drain and running water to clean the sink like I was a career maid at the local Super 8. It was impressive.

The best ever though was when I got a little carried away at a Christmas party at my boss' house when I worked at a TV station up in Wisconsin years back. It was my first big social event with most of my co-workers, including my boss, and I ended up in his bathroom upstairs at the end of the night ... and, well, you can guess. I was on my hands and knees cleaning off the toilet seat and wall (hey, you miss sometimes) for what seemed like an hour. I came out thinking I was in the clear as I was mercifully driven home by a friendly TV person. That was until Monday morning at the station when my boss called me into his office and told me his wife had spent the next morning cleaning up the spots I had "missed." It wasn't my finest hour, but my boss was super cool with the whole thing and actually just made fun of me. I called his wife to apologize later that day and she loved me forever because of it -- the call to apologize that is, not the puke on the wall. See, effort counts in life.

Thank God the Cavs get back to work Wednesday. If all I had to watch right now was the Tribe I would be making repeated trips to Chad and Sean's kitchen sink or my boss' bathroom. I've said all along that the team that scared me the most in the East was Orlando. I don't like the way the Cavs match-up with them. They're big and they all can shoot (with the exception of Dwight Howard). With that said, I still like the Cavs. They are on a mission right now. They're the only team left that has that look. Boston had it last year. The Cavs have it this year. Denver has played really well, but they have that look the Cavs had two years ago. You know the look. It says, "I can't believe it's late-May and we're still playing. This is great!!" I see the Lakers beating them in 6 or 7. And Orlando's just not ready for this stage. The Cavs have the experience. They have the homecourt. They have that look of a team that's on a mission. And most importantly, of course, they have LeBron. I just don't see anyone beating them 4 times in 7 games. I really don't. I like the Cavs in 6 (possibly 7).

Before I go, are you paying attention to what's going on in Lexington right now? Yes, that Lexington. The home of this. UK Basketball is scary good on paper right now, and we still don't even know yet if Jodie Meeks will take his name out of the NBA Draft. (He should, by the way.) We've gone from an NIT berth and a team in turmoil beause of rumors that the coach might get fired and the two best players would leave for the riches of the NBA ... to a legit national title contender in a span of less than two months! I loved the Calipari hire as I expressed in this post back on April 1, but even I wasn't expecting all that's taken place in the weeks since. When John Wall announced his decision to attend UK late Monday night the Cats immediately became a team that has to be ranked in the preseason Top 5, if not the Top 2 or 3. Patrick Patterson announced he's coming back a few weeks ago. And they already had what was widely thought of as the best recruiting class in the country coming in before Wall committed.

So, IF Meeks comes back, here's what we're talking about roster-wise next year: 2 legit first team All-American candidates in Patterson and Meeks; 6'9'' senior Perry Stevenson down low (a very serviceable big man who's started the past two years); promising 6'7" sophomore Darius Miller (who saw major minutes last year as a freshman and who could thrive in Cal's system); shaky but ultra-athletic 6'6" sophomore DeAndre Liggins (another that could thrive under Cal); Ramon Harris (another senior who's played major minutes in his career) and, of course, the SPECTACULAR freshman class. Four guys ranked in the Top 25 by Rivals.com, including the top two -- Wall (No. 1) and DeMarcus Cousins (No. 2). Wall's a point guard and Cousins is 6'10". Throw in Daniel Orton (No. 22), Eric Bledsoe (No. 23) and 4-star recruit and the reigning Kentucky "Mr. Basketball" Jon Hood (No. 40) and I think we might have something. Oh, and don't forget about the coveted JUCO transfer Darnell Dodson. Wow.

Soak it in.

That Sweet Sweet Music

Following along with my post last week about the Pens/Caps series and how it helped bring me back to the game of hockey, let me tell you about the best thing hockey has going for it right now. Its not the young stars taking control of the game, its not breathtaking saves, hell its not even the fights, it is....THE HOCKEY ORGAN!!! Is there a better musical instrument than this? Quick and simple answer..NO!

While watching any hockey game recently, and believe me I have watched my fair share, whenever I hear the dulcet tones of the horgan, I first crack up laughing because it sounds like something that is more suited for this, and second my mind starts racing to figure out which song it is projecting for the masses. For example, the lady and I were watching one of the Pens-Caps games last week and the horganist decides its the perfect time to play Pink's "Rock Star", and who is going to argue with a horganist. I am not a fan on Pink, never really have been, maybe she has one song that I may enjoy, but that's about it, but whenever one of her songs is played with the sweet ivory of the keys on a horgan I LOVE IT!!!

Another example, I was watching a Red Wings-Ducks game when Detroit's professional horganist chooses to play Katy Perry's "Hot-n-Cold"....PRICELESS!! I have no problem admitting I've been known to drink a few beers and belt out the words to this song, but I was sober and singing along this time. The fact of the matter is while church organs are nice, hockey organs are SPECTACULAR! They literally sound like a 1980's hair band synthesizer on steroids. (Gary Bettman, please don't test it!)

I think my appreciation for this magic maker first began back in college. I was at a Flyers playoff game against Tampa Bay back in 2003, if my memory is correct. 20,000 Philadelphians wearing at least one piece of orange clothing each, this place needed no extra incentive to be riled up, but then it happened...ENTER SANDMAN ON THE ORGAN!! I was blown away, it was one of the coolest things I have ever heard, and the Wachovia Center went nuts. If Metallica would have been there, they would've left with their tales between their legs, that's how impressive it was. I really think the sweet sounds were solely responsible for the Flyers victory that night. So the next time you're at a hockey game, and you really should try to get out to one, raise a Bud Light to local horganist, because he is....A Real American Hero. (Or Man of Genius, whichever you prefer.)

In Case You Missed It

As the title says, in case you missed it, and you probably did, the second best postseason series of the spring concluded last night. The first is clearly the Celtics-Bulls marathon, but the Penguins and Capitals ended what was one of the best NHL postseason series this decade, and definitely the best since the lockout ruined hockey. This was one of those unique series that had just about everything and because of that I was captivated by it. It also didn't hurt that my girlfriend is a Pens fan, but I digress. I will admit, I am slowly becoming a hockey fan again, and this series may have been the clincher. 7 games, 3 that went to overtime, constant back and forth, countless series changing moments, this series had it ALL!!!

Obviously star-power is the first ingredient to any classic series. When Evgeni Malkin is the 3rd and sometimes 4th best player on the ice depending on how Marc-Andre Fleury is playing, you know the stars have come out to play. Alex Ovechkin and Sidney Crosby are laying the groundwork for a legendary duel that may take 10 years to play out, with other young studs such as Malkin, Fleury, Jordan Stall, Simeon Varlamov, Mike Green and Nick Backstrom providing support. Ovechkin, who I must admit I'm developing a little bit of a man crush on in a strictly athletic sense, reminds me a lot of Mario Lemieux with his combination of size, power, and skill that no one else on the ice possesses, whereas Crosby is a lot more like Wayne Gretzky. He just glides along the ice making it look effortless sometimes, and he has some of the best hands I have ever seen on a hockey player. These two teams are just scratching the surface of their potential and the Penguins have already been to the Stanley Cup Finals.

Aside from the young guns, this series also had the wily veterans looking for another sip from Lord Stanley's Cup. Bill Guerin for the Pens providing another option for a team already loaded with offense, and a former league MVP in Sergei Federov coming through with the great two-way play that made him a perennial All-Star in Detroit. It was so much fun to watch these two generations of players come together on these teams.

What really took this series to the next level though was the energy that was brought to the rink by these two fan bases. Of course if you have watched hockey over the past 20 years then you know that Pens fans know how to 'bring it", but what was amazing was how Caps fans responded to the teams longest playoff run in over 10 years. The "Rock the Red" was one of the better individual team promotions in a long time, and the Caps definitely capitalized on a perfect storm in the D.C. sports scene. With the Nationals and Wizards among the worst teams in their leagues and the Redskins mired in mediocrity the Caps became the only team worth showing up for in the Nation's Capital, and they came through.

If I were Gary Bettman and thank God I'm not, I would find a way to manipulate it so that for the next 10 years these two teams meet every year in the postseason. It was a thrill to watch these two teams and all of the superstars that came with them battle it out for 7 games. Sure Game 7 was a dud compared to the first 6, but the fact was I WATCHED Game 7 because I didn't know what I would see next. This may be the kind of series that gets hockey back on television regularly, (seriously, Versus?) I grew up loving the game of hockey, and admit that I kind of lost touch with it during the no obstruction penalty years and ultimately the lockout, but I'm back now and I hope other disconnected fans feel the same.

Side Effects?

Ok, so it has now been 5 days since Manny Ramirez was suspended by MLB for testing positive for a banned substance, which we now know falls under the performance enhancing drug category. Due to my status as a Red Sox fan I have had people ask my opinion of the whole situation, and at first I wasn't going to write anything about it, but after doing some deep thought and reflection I feel as if I need to say this, Ramirez's suspension changes NOTHING!!!

How do I feel about the Red Sox' World Series victories in 2004 and 2007? The same way I felt about them yesterday and the day before that, and the week before that, and the months and years before that...GREAT! Manny Ramirez testing positive for performance doesn't change one thing and if you continue reading you will understand why.

Did it hurt a little bit to know that a guy I followed religiously for almost 8 years on teams that I felt I connected with tested positive for performance enhancing drugs? Of course it does. As a fan, if you invest time, energy and even money into following a team, news like this is always going to hurt, however with the current state of baseball, nothing surprises me anymore. Steroids and other performance enhancing drugs are going to be the iconic symbol for Major League Baseball from 1987 through probably 2015 (or whenever A-rod retires). The talk of steroids will go on even longer as a result of the great Hall of Fame debates that will take place over the next 15-25 years. So while as a fan it did sting for a minute, that was the extent of it.

If anyone wants to bring up the argument that the Red Sox World Series victories are now somehow tainted, then tell that person to read the above paragraph and also let them know that they might be the most ignorant person on the face of the earth. Say Ramirez was using while with the Red Sox (and we'll address that issue in just a moment), are you then saying the only team with steroid users was the Red Sox, HELL NO!!! Every team in MLB had at least one player and in many cases, players plural, juicing at one time or another over the past 20 years, so don't try to tell me that Ramirez was the only person using at that time, which brings me to my next point.....

How do we even know Ramirez was using with the Red Sox? We don't. Before everyone calls out my Red Sox bias hear me out. Manny came up with the Indians in 1994 and hit 17 home runs in 91 games. That was his last partial season in the big leagues. His home run totals since then have been in order, 31, 33, 26, 45, 44, 38, 41, 33, 37, 43, 45, 35, 20, 37 (20 in Boston, 17 in L.A.) What jumps out at me there is the relative consistency up until the end of his time in Boston. Unlike most juicers Manny never had that breakout, "this year is so much better then any year we have ever seen from him" year. He wasn't Brett Boone going from years of 63 and 74 RBI to 141. He wasn't Brady Anderson going from a 50 steals guy to 50 home run hitter. The point is Manny was always one of the most well rounded hitters in the game, and what his overall numbers tell me is one of two things, A) He has always been on steroids, how else could you explain his consistency, or B) After his down year in 2007, he realized with that kind of production the Red Sox would not pick up his option years and no team would come close to the 20 million those years were worth, so in an attempt to conjure Vintage Manny Ramirez he began to cycle steroids eventually becoming the modern day Babe Ruth in 2 months with the Dodgers. Agree with those assessments or not, one thing I do know is Manny has been and probably will always be the best right handed hitter of our generation, (although Pujols might have something to say about that). Just look at the numbers. Every suspected juicer has a huge spike in production for a 2-4 year period, Manny's only spike is 2008. The numbers don't lie.


Still not enough for you guys to look passed my Red Sox bias, ok, how bout this one. I already know that members of the Red Sox were juicing during the 2004 World Series. Am I 100 % sure? No, but are there signs that point me in that direction? Yes. I have already relegated myself to the fact that Johnny Damon, Trot Nixon, Bill Mueller, possibly Keith Foulke, and sadly even Nomar were all juicing at some point while they were with the Sox. The eye test is too strong to think otherwise. So what if Ramirez was juicing? The point is so was everyone else in MLB. It doesn't take anything away from a moment that brought myself, my grandfather and millions of other Red Sox fans to tears.


Staying on the subject of steroids, Roger Clemens was back in the news today, and I don't even want to give this jackass the time of day but he spoke so "eloquently" once again that I have to comment. First of all EVERYONE knows Roger Clemens took some type of performance enhancing drug, as I mentioned earlier THE EYE TEST is going crazy. So today on Mike and Mike in the Morning Roger Clemens addressed a tell all book written by four New York Daily News writers set to be released tomorrow. My recollection of the interview may not be verbatim, but it's pretty damn close. When asked about his "alleged"use of PED's, Clemens rattled off this beauty, "...why would I take steroids when we have a history of heart problems in my family. My father had a heart attack, my stepfather had a heart attack..." Let that sink in for a minute....do you know whats wrong with that statement? Hey Roger, your stepfather has no bearing on your personal health. But wait it gets better, when asked about Andy Petitte's sworn testimony, Clemens said, "...my answer to that is the same as it has always been, Andy misremembers..." Now clearly Roger watches the news and reads the newspapers because I watch Sportscenter everyday and I had no idea this book was being released, so he has to know by now that "misremembers" isnt even a word...hold on....yep spell check just confirmed for me that misremembers is in fact NOT a word. I want to villify Clemens but when he says some of the things that he does as regularly as he does you almost have to feel sorry for him........almost.

He's One Of The Good Guys

As sports fans we all clearly have our favorite teams and players. In case you hadn't figured it out, mine happen to be the Red Sox and Redskins. What makes sports so much fun though is the fact that as sports fans we can rally around a certain team or player(s) for any amount of time for any reason. I may only be speaking for myself because my entire world revolves around sports, but I have been known to follow a team I have never followed before simply because they were fun to watch, one of their players had a great story, their coach was a soundbite waiting to happen, whatever the reason may have been that particular team or player was able to draw me in. That is why my heart almost dropped the other night when I saw St. Louis Cardinals outfielder Rick Ankiel go flying face first into the wall unable to protect himself. Ankiel is one those players I am talking about.

For those of you who don't who Rick Ankiel is, his story, in a completely athletic sense, is miraculous. No he didn't survive some terrible accident or fight off some life threatening disease or even overcome a debilitating injury. I am not trying to compare him to athletes who stories are more along those lines, but what Ankiel did do is make it to the Majors as a stud young pitcher only to watch himself lose his ability to throw strikes, spend years in the minors trying to work out the kinks to no avail, then try his hand as an outfielder, get called BACK UP to the Majors, and hit 25 homeruns in his first full season as a position player. Did I mention the guy plays pretty good defense too. I have never been to St. Louis, I have no connection to St. Louis, I'll even say of the probably 5 people I have met from St. Louis I dislike 4 of them, however I want Rick Ankiel to succeed.

In the late 90's Ankiel was a cant miss prospect in the Cardinals organization with a fastball you couldn't see and a curveball you couldn't hit. In 2000 as a 20 year old for the Cardinals he went 11-7 with 3.50 ERA and 195 strikeouts. Even the fast track was too slow for Ankiel, he was a sure fire future Cy Young award winner. Then for whatever reason in the postseason of that same year he forgot how to throw strikes, and I'm not talking missing by a couple of inches, I'm talking wild pitches 2 feet above or to the side of the catcher. His ERA in the playoffs that year, 15.75 in only 4 innings pitched with 9, yes 9 wild pitches. How could this have happened to such a good player in such a short period of time? To this day I think if you ask anyone in the Cardinals organization you wouldn't get an answer.

The Cards put him back in the rotation at the start of the 2001 season only to see the problems hadn't gone away. They sent him back down to the minors to try and fix whatever was bothering him, but that didn't work either. As a baseball fan it was a pretty painful process to watch. After a couple more years of little success Ankiel decided to give up his dream of pitching in the big leagues, but not on the dream as a whole.

Imagine my surprise two summers ago when I am watching Baseball Tonight and I hear the name Rick Ankiel, St. Louis Cardinals. Surely they weren't trotting this guy out to the mound again? No they were not, they were starting him in right field...RIGHT FIELD!!! Not only that but the guy could hit. In one of his first games back he hits a homerun (to play the video go to August 9th), and from there he went on a tear to end the season. Never in my life watching baseball have I seen a guy get called up with great expectations at one position, fail, then get called up several years later and succeed. That is not supposed to happen. Not only did he get called up but he produced. 11 homers and 39 RBI in 47 games in 2007, 25 taters and 71 RBI last year. AMAZING!!! Not only that but he may have made two of the best throws I have ever seen from an out fielder in my life. Rick Ankiel had finally arrived.

That's why what happened the other night was so scary. You never want to see anyone get hurt, but for me I especially don't want to see him get hurt. Sure there are guys that spend 10 years in the minors only to get called up for one game and that's it. Once again I am not trivializing anyone elses trials and tribulations, but while Ankiel was spending time in the minors he was also under a microscope as a result of being a guy who had it and then lost it. It was good to hear that Ankiel had been released from the hospital, lets just hope whatever he was doing right didn't get knocked loose by that collision. In a sports world that is currently dominated by dollars and sense it is nice to have someone to root for.

Greg's Quick Hitters

I apologize for another delay in between posts, but I've been watching the Indians all year and it's becoming more and more difficult to function on a day-to-day basis. I have a full post in me about this debacle, but I'm not ready to write it yet. So for now, it's time for another round of Quick Hitters...

M-V-P! M-V-P! It was great to see LeBron take home the NBA's MVP award. Very well-deserved. He's the best player on the planet right now, and I'm not sure it's that close. Unfortunately, that doesn't guarantee a championship. Kobe is still very scary and he happens to have a better "second banana" in Pau Gasol than LeBron has at his disposal. But, I really do like the way the Cavs are playing right now. It would be a great series with the Lakers if it happens. And I think it will.

Have you seen this video of Chicago Bears draft pick Jarron Gilbert jumping out of a pool? Are you kidding me?!? That is one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. He makes it look pretty easy, but do you understand how ridiculous that is? He was in four feet of water!! That is sick. I become more and more convinced every year that pro athletes are not actual humans.

Daisy of Love. Really?? Seriously, really? Everyone knows I love Celebreality, but come on. Even I have a breaking point. They're recycling contestants/wannabe actors at this point. My boy 12 Pack is having a tougher time finding love than Bret Michaels. One of these days, 12 Pack, one of these days.

It's been a little more than a month, so it's time to check in on my favorite college football coach -- Mike Gundy. Yes, he's still a man. And, yes, he's still 40. God, I love that video.

Hey Yankees, nice job on your new ballpark. I could hit a homer to right field in that place. Watching the Tribe-Yanks series a few weeks ago at "New" Yankee Stadium was like watching a wiffleball home run derby.

Speaking of the Yankees ... A-Rod. I mean, I don't even know what to say anymore. I've never had much of an opinion on him to be honest, and that remains the case. He's a very good baseball player, but I've never really wanted him on my team. He'll go down as one of the strangest athletes of my lifetime. Tyson. A-Rod. Rodman. Terrell Owens. Manute Bol. They are all fantastic talents, but somewhere the line between great player and great nutjob got way too blurred.

Hey guys, did you know the average woman's bra size is a 36C, which is supposedly equal to a 34D? I was floored by this, and I consider myself quite the breast connoisseur. Seriously, I feel like we guys have always held the "D" cup in such high regard. And now to find out it's basically average?! Kind of sad. It would be like if this scenario unfolded... You're a sophomore in high school. There's this one girl in your class that every guy drools over. She's the hottest girl in school. But she won't give any guy the time of day, not even the senior guys. One Friday night after the football game you find yourself at a party that this girl is also attending. Somehow -- inexplicably -- you end up talking to her. You're out in the backyard by a half-hearted bonfire. It's just you, her and two guys smoking weed that you've never seen before. Oh, and the host of the party's 35-year-old uncle. But, he's passed out. Thankfully. And all of the sudden you find yourself making out with this girl! It's like God shined his light directly on you. It's the greatest moment of your life until a little later when, in a drunken state, she opens up to you. You sit horrified as she tells you that she's nailed five guys from another high school and your geography teacher -- in the past month. Suddenly, making out with the hottest girl in school isn't so cool. And that's how I feel now about the "D" cup.

There's really nowhere to go after that, so I'll end with this: Jhonny Peralta is slowly killing my will to live.

Is Nothing Sacred!!!

Ok so I know I said I wouldn't take long breaks between blogs anymore, but I had to ponder this one for a few days. So I was watching Real Sports errr.....I mean E:60 on ESPN the other night when a story about a man named Greg Valentino came on. For those who don't know who Valentino is, he is this guy. Valentino is known as "The Man Whose Arms Exploded." He abused steroids so frequently that at one point one of biceps actually burst. At his steroid peak he was pumping 4-5000 milligrams of testosterone into his body per week. The human body on its own only produces 50-100 milligrams a week. However Valentino is not the topic of this blog, rather it was another person interviewed for the story, and what this person revealed was so shocking and mind-blowing that I am amazed my head has not exploded yet.

The man who I am talking about is Dan Clark. Think about that name for a minute, does it ring a bell? It shouldn't, but how about this name.....wait for it....wait for it....Nitro as in Nitro from American Gladiators. In the ESPN piece, Nitro a.k.a. Mr. Clark revealed that he had abused steroids for close to 20 years. Once I heard this I immediately had to take a shower, I felt so dirty. You mean to tell me that American Gladiators was not a clean sport. I get why Major League Baseball players use steroids, I understand why NFL players juice, but American Gladiators? If we cant trust our (and yes they belong to us) American Gladiators then who can we trust?

When you are given the privilege to be an American Gladiator, you are not only representing yourself and your fellow gladiators, you are representing all of America. In a world based upon integrity, honor, and dignity what Nitro did was spit in the face of the Ol' Red, White, and Blue, through a twisted tale of lies and deception. All of those victories over everyday Joes in events such as Powerball, Breakthrough and Conquer, Joust, Assault, Atlasspheres, Dogfight, Duel, Gauntlet, Hang Tough, Pursuit, The Wall, and Tug-o-War (just to name a few) should be wiped clean. Forget the asterisks, take them out of the record books COMPLETELY!!! What kind of an example would we as Americans be setting for the youth of our country if we did not make an example of this Monster.

Mr. Clark's admission has made me rethink everything about American Gladiators. Do you mean to tell me that Gemini wasn't an actual constellation in the galaxy that could only be seen under the bright lights of Universal Studios Arena? I supposed next you would tell me that Zap and Laser were not actually born from lightning bolts from the great God Zeus. After telling me that you can then ruin my day by telling me Turbo's heart was only a V-6 engine and not the V-8 I had previously thought. You could even go a step further and tell me that Lace has bad skin. And if you really wanted me to jump off of a cliff you would tell me that that wasn't Malibu's real hair!!!

But why stop with the Gladiators? Maybe Color Analyst Larry Csonka really didn't know he had to look into the camera. Maybe that wasn't really Mike Adamle's voice. And worst of all maybe all of those signs in the crowd weren't made by the fans but rather by NBC executives. Mr. Clark has now brought into question everything about what used to one of the greatest sporting periods in American History. The only thing I can hope for now is that the powers that be at American Gladiators have cleaned up their acts and taken the blindfold off of America because with everything going on in the world today I don't think Americans could stomach the idea of New American Gladiator Wolf not actually being a wolf.